8. EXODUS, THE BLANK CANVAS

PART 1: Step Into The Unknown

Numbers 14:11- “And the Lord said to Moses ‘How long will this people despise Me? And how long will they not believe in Me? despite all the signs that I have done among them?”

My late mother had different sizes of jigsaw puzzles that she loved to build. When she worked on them, she would be very still, focused, and uttering no words. I think that it was her moment of emotional purification. Even though the unforeseen day-to-day movements were setting her back, nothing would deter her. Regardless of how long it would take her to build, she had patience in achieving her expectations. The joy of seeing her face light up on her completed work was more fulfilling. The more she challenged herself on assembling difficult pieces, the wiser she would be in planning her day-to-day.

I was emotionally and mentally immature, baffled by the process of my transformation. I never anticipated the stages I would take to declutter my negative past. The step-by-step disentanglement of those negative outlooks that resulted in some people avoiding my presence; led me to a state of panic. Thinking that God was taking forever. I forcefully rushed to achieve my expectations. The more I strategized on “my better ways” of reaching my expectations, the farther I was drifting from the light (Numbers 14:39-45). Despairingly, I noticed that “my better ways”, were leading me to darkness, and I failed to find pleasure and encouragement to enjoy the journey. I was tortured and captured by the same old tedious ways that always left me frustrated with the same old results.

BE PATIENT WITH YOURSELF

God remains unwavering in all our tantrums, He is patient with us, working on us through all the stages of change –Jeremiah 29: 11 “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.” Revealing to us the extent of the danger, that masking was blindly burying us into. And the journey of spiritual rebuilding has many twists and turns. It is a joy to be given a chance to start over and have new beginnings. Transformation then allows us to slowly let go of control and be entirely dependent on God. It strengthens our faith to evolve with changes. You learn detachment to break off your barriers, and it allows you to become vulnerable while living in harmony.

BE IN THE PRESENT WITH YOURSELF

Luke 12: 35 “Stay dressed for action and keep your lamp burning…”

God removes us from our vision board of expectations to journey us somewhere we never thought of (Exodus 34: 10…” I will do marvels, such as have not been created in all the earth or in any nation”). I had stopped having those awed moments of excitement thinking that the last piece of a puzzle had completely answered my questions. He has these unexpected jigsaw puzzle pieces, which will unveil a portion of what your mind and heart are ready for at that time. Your picture is never complete with Him; it keeps on growing and changing. My journey has taught me that, God does not speak in straight lines, and the best is to be in the present moment.

Living in the present teaches us the flexibility to adapt to the unexpected and wisely make good choices. Humility sways you to stillness and strengthens your connection with God. When we fail to humble ourselves to God and patiently allow Him to gradually unravels all that is dangerously hidden, lurking to creep out with intentions to taint us.  We then resentfully undermine the present (Numbers 11:4-6). It demeans God comparing Him to the old ways. The old ways that were breaking us, keeping us captive, a place we showed feelings of dissatisfaction that we yearned to be set free from. At the end of the day, being rebellious and refusing to connect yourself with this moment, means missing all that good God has prepared for you (Numbers 14: 28-35).

The mysteries of the unexpected are much more enjoyable when one surrender to God. I put an end to the self-reproach that was slyly disheartening my spirit. And, if I had not remained still, focused, I would have not seen the danger that my rebellious actions were cunningly leading me to. Therefore, if we can accept that the vision board, is for us to live by His Great Commandment (Matthew 22:37-39), we can then become the jigsaw puzzle pieces, that effortlessly allow our detours to strengthen us and fulfill His mission (Psalm 37:23 “The steps of a man are established by the Lord when He delights in his way.”)

 It is a great joy that we stood firm, and waited for what was passing to pass, for we have been undeniably blessed by what is lasting last. It is TIME FOR HARVEST.

May God Bless Us All