5. WE ARE LIVING IN THE COLORS OF LOVE

Matthew 19:14 Jesus said, “Let the children come to Me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these”.

When we are broken, everything standstill, colours fade, and dreams starts to collect dusts, but the ticking hands on the clock keeps turning and never stops.

A child is a high energetic playful light-hearted spirit with a smile that exude good healing energy to those around, they see beauty in everyone. Children are beautiful souls that are full of love, speaks the truth, obeys orders and good listeners that are ready to learn new things all the time. Children are very trusting, whatever they ask for they believe that they will receive it. They live without worry about tomorrow; their minds are at peace, they forgive and hold no grudges, they are very kind, friendly and selfless. Children believe they can do anything and are not ashamed of themselves. They have that innocent spirit of God, touching our hearts leaving us with wonder of how we have lost ourselves.

For the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these”. The purpose of rebuilding was to declutter the dead weight of my pasts, to create a place for God to dwell and be in unity with Him: Matthew 22:21…”and give God the things that are God’s”. The past wounds that I kept alive unknowingly, were recurring, giving me the same negative results, building more negative habits that were not easily hidden. This is the moment that was slowly removing me away from God and killing the child qualities in me, flooding my mind with ugly negative words of failure. Hell was a closer place with a loudest voice saying, “impossible, not you, give up, you will never make it.” I was slowly burying myself deeper and deeper to the dark cold lonely pit of masking.

“Let the children come to Me, and do not hinder them”. God is calling you and I, to let go of control, worry, and let Him take a lead of our lives. He wants to bring back the child likeminded qualities that we blindly allowed the challenges we faced, to weaken them. He wants to show us that we are not alone. He wants us to be like Him, He wants to provide for us, He wants us to believe in ourselves, He wants us to feel safe in His arms, He wants to light up our ways. There is nothing so painful than to walk with a distorted mind always keeping “alert” and expecting the worst in everyone. You find yourself heavy with bitterness always ready to defend yourself, stubbornly covering yourself with tons of “keep out” concrete signs, that hides the beautiful character that God blessed you with. I had walked with that heaviness and I had learnt that in as much as I thought I was good at hiding my past, nothing I had, had prepared me for what God was about to do in my life, hence I surrendered and sought Him first. Digging deeper is the toughest daily test I had ever taken. It gradually removes all inflexibilities and strips off the ego. He slowly rebuilt the child qualities in me, daily developing myself and blessing me with amazing wonders of being in the kingdom of heaven.

WE ARE IN ONE SPIRIT

Children always have positive mind that lights up our lives, you find yourself smiling and forgetting all sadness when you are in their presence. They give you that moment of healing clearing your ways that “it is never too late.” John 1:1 mentions that- “In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.” This is the Word in Genesis 1:26 where God said, “Let Us make man in Our image, after Our likeness” and further describe in Genesis 1:27 “So God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him, male and female He created them.” God is the undying Light full of everlasting love that heals our wounds of the flesh and wounds of the heart. God created us to submit ourselves to Him first, giving Him us, He willingly gives us Him, and that makes us represent Him in each other and in Him. God is our Healer that sees beauty in us all, full of love and speaks nothing but the Truth. He is ready always to teach us new things, He trust Himself and believes we can do all things when we believe in ourselves. He wants us to live without worry for our minds to be at peace. He is forgiving, kind, friendly and holds no grudges.

We become the light selflessly lighting up for others while they light up for us, we become His voice that speaks His Word to each other in many ways. The love, healing, kindness, sympathy, compassion, selflessness, humility your heart gives out to others brightens up their days and gives them hope. And you will receive it back more than you had done to others. Giving out a positive energy and constantly praying for others even in times of sorrows heals those who are not able to pray for themselves. This is the glory of knowing that someone else you do not know is also praying for you, strengthening your heart too (Matthew 6:9 Our Father in heaven…”).

I found love, support, kindness from people I never thought of in times of need, and God was showing me that when I let go of expectations, His great love works and miraculously creates wonders. God is saying to us that “we are not alone, we have Him and we have each other.”

It is time we become the positive beautiful co-creators of harmony and have hope, faith, and trust in God, it is time we become like children and enjoy His kingdom and be co-creators of His beauty and continue living in the colours of love. Let us forgive each other and find healing because God can work on our broken selves. We are the Change Makers breaking off the generational curses of the pasts.

God is calling us,

May God Bless Us All

12. WILDERNESS, A GLASS-HALF-FULL

Matthew 9: 16-17 “No one puts a piece of unshrunk cloth on an old garment, for the patch tears away from the garment and a worse tear is made. Neither is new wine put into old wineskins. If it is, the skins burst and the wine is spilled, and the skins are destroyed. But new wine is put into fresh wineskins, and so both are preserved.”  

ALONE IN TRANSITION

When my son was in the second grade, he wanted help on the presentation of a metamorphosis of a butterfly.” Hearing the word metamorphosis left me mentally paralyzed, but knowing my son, he will find it amusing if I would ask him the meaning of the word. I was not going to let him call me cavewoman; besides, I have vague memories of my foundation phase in the class, except for lunch breaks. Thank goodness for civilization, my mobile came in handy for me unnoticed. 

Metamorphosis, a word full of hope.

I want to touch on one phase of the butterfly in its transformational cycle, which was incredibly challenging for me to relate to. Chrysalis, of which to me it meant alone in transition.

“In all God’s creation, humans in the honor of dominating nature, sometimes struggle to trust their own intuition. Nature is created to respond to its transformational cycle, purely reliant on other systems. Our planet earth rotates once in 24 hours to give a full day. Those many days feed the tilting process of the planet earth to evolve to each season, leading to a full year that propels us to age one more year. When the caterpillar reaches the chrysalis phase, it mindfully searches the secure place away from harm to pupate. Inside that cocoon it slowly naturally mutates, trusting and using this moment wisely, shedding the past experiences of being a caterpillar, and striving to be better than yesterday. There is no choice of edible leaves or plants. Whatever it ate during the larva phase, has substantial nutrients to sustain it in its chrysalis period. It has no knowledge and is not worried about how it will turn out to be.”

In as much as I was dissatisfied with my life, I felt defeated and saw no hope in my dreams ever coming through. My life changed when I received a tantalizing foretaste of the life I could live, and I wanted more of it. I gave up my life, I followed Jesus Christ and He took me through the process of my transformation.

Nothing is as easy as it seems or as you hear about it, but nothing is impossible through Christ our Lord: Philippians 4:13

In the past year, I attended a training in Change Management, and I learnt about Elizabeth Kübler- Ross Grief Cycle. I must say, it was very insightful to go deep into those stages of grief trying to find myself, but particularly challenging and embarrassing to relate and accept that I was in distress. Reaching a phase of transitioning alone, became a wrestle that I lost. I found myself bargaining with God, holding on strongly to things, ways, and people He wanted me to let go of. Yes, I wanted a new life but how possible could it be in my age, background, and mistakes I made, etc. I mean my life was unstable, wrecked finances, lifeless relationships, at least I wanted to resuscitate some part of my life on my own.

What an implausible excuse of lies, let me just say it, “I did not believe in myself, and I was afraid”

Do not doubt what you have in your hands, and not once should you talk yourself out of your inheritance: Exodus 4: 2

My first writing, “Masking is a grave”, I wrote about my emotional blindness, my excessive selflessness, and how I struggled to rescue myself. Letting go of control and accepting the cocoon phase enlightened my eyes to understand the effects of my choices. Primarily, the purpose of transitioning alone was to reflect and see the glass half-full even in that cocoon. It was to transition out of the old mindset to be the new optimistic mindful person. Formerly, I was unintelligent and misused my inheritance, negatively perceiving them insufficient for me to initially take steps closing a gap to reach my goals. God led me to my blank canvas (Habakkuk 2:2) with a question of “why was I rejecting and destroying what was given to me?” A changed mindset is immensely powerful. I looked at myself differently, with a lot of self-love. But amazingly God wanted me to look deeply into how I can emotionally relate to the blessings that were in front of me.  Firstly, it was imperative that I begin with the most important gifts we all receive, however the amount. The value of time, and value of resources.

Was I investing towards my goals, what were the returns?

You have an unlimited resource; one talent is enough to open many doors: 1 Samuel 17:49

The wilderness seems dry, deserted, and has no activities, but you never run low on essentials. It is that phase of self-introspection, devising new ways on exploiting your given time and resources, towards reaching your goals. It sheds off the old you. You daily have self-positive affirmation that changes your mind, and you work hard and continue to work until someone comes and change to improve your system (Exodus 18:13-23). It trains you to recognize, appreciate and use wisely the opportunities that comes your way. Be optimistic, allow yourself time to go through all stages of grief and transformation. Learn from your past but mostly this day, this moment is enough on its own. Do not be afraid of working alone, it gives your perspective of knowing yourself, your weaknesses, and your strengths

Metamorphosis, a word full of hope,

Filling the half-full glass is uplifting. Enjoy the journey.

MAY GOD BLESS US ALL